Tuesday, July 5, 2016

Harris Teeter Pizza Review

Sausage, Pepperoni & Bacon Pizza

You never know where the search for the perfect slice of pizza will take you. Today's journey brought me to Harris Teeter, a relatively upscale grocery store that looks a lot nicer (and costs a bit more) than the average Giant Food or Safeway location. I resisted the urge to try the $5.99 lunch buffet at nearby Chuck E. Cheese's, and made it back to the North Bethesda Teeter, appetite in place. $2.49 + tax (and oodles of disappointment) later, I had to ask... Did I make the right choice? Probably not.

I haven't had Chuck E. Cheese's in years decades; but I imagine the pizza is still pretty awful. Unfortunately, my slice of Sausage, Pepperoni & Bacon pizza at Teeter's upstairs Fresh Food Market was probably worse (not to mention more expensive.) My slice didn't require heating, but hot was about the only thing going for it. The man at the counter was pleasant enough; but I found the cashier area to be unprofessional at best worst. The cashier was surly, and there was an older female (manager?) literally propped against the front of the register, yapping away to a third employee. So much for good customer service... and first impressions.

The dining area wasn't much better: My table had strands of lettuce left over from God knows what, and there wasn't a napkin to be found (all tables should have napkin dispensers, period.) As for the pizza, let's start with the positives. Awesome bacon. Salty, thick and well-done. Plus, the slice was (for the most part) hot. Now, on to the negatives. The pepperoni was greasy, yet flavorless. The sausage crumbs were identical in taste to those found on a Celeste Pizza for One (not a compliment) and the crust was bland, doughy and ultimately inedible. The cheese-to-sauce ratio was completely out of whack (way too much cheese, hardly any sauce) and neither packed any flavor whatsoever.

I (literally) picked at it for a few minutes, before ditching it in the nearest trash can. You should have seen the grease: It soaked right through the bottom of the container, covering more than a third of the exterior. Gross. Imagine that going into your body. Better yet, imagine going back to Harris Teeter's for seconds, or (shudder) thirds. Fat chance.

Atmosphere: F (I can't stand to see employees "carrying on" instead of helping customers. A dirty table didn't help either.)
Crust: F (Too thick, zero flavor.)
Toppings: C- (That bacon was delicious... Otherwise, way below average.)
Value: D- ($2.49 for a good slice of pizza is fine. This wasn't good pizza.)
Service: D- (See atmosphere.)
Overall: F (Really, really bad. Never, ever again.)