Tuesday, October 7, 2014

Villa Italian Kitchen Food Review

Pepperoni Neapolitan Pizza

A Sbarro impersonator... Could it get any worse? After one lousy slice at Villa Italian Kitchen, the answer is (unequivocally) yes! I've tried dozens of different slices in and around DC; and with the possible exception of Bethesda's Vince & Dominic's Pizzeria, there is no worse slice in town. Chew on that, next time you're trapped at the Fashion Centre at Pentagon City's food court.

It takes a "special" eatery to attract almost zero customers during Pentagon City's madhouse lunch hour (noon-1 PM.) At 12:30, I was the only person there (not including two surly employees, who didn't seem to care if I ordered or not.) I asked for a slice of Pepperoni Neapolitan Pizza ($4.39) advertised as "the perfect thin-style crust topped with sauce, loads of melted cheese and your favorite toppings." Sounds great, doesn't it? Trust me: It's not.

For starters, $4.39 + tax for a relatively small slice of pizza (and no drink) is downright "criminal." Top that off with greasy pepperoni, underdone/flimsy crust and some of the most generic, nondescript cheese & tomato sauce available... and it's amazing I was able to finish four bites, before giving up altogether. How do you mess up something as simple as pizza?

Eventually, a few people found the courage to stop by... clearly unaware of the calamity about to befall them. Perhaps they went for one of those "delicious" pasta dishes with pre-made spaghetti, or (shudder) a full pie. My guess? Whatever it was... wound up in the same bin. Good riddance.

Atmosphere: D (When Pentagon City's food court is the best part of your meal, you're in BIG trouble.)
Crust: F (Flimsy to a fault. Undercooked. Awful.)
Toppings: F (If greasy pepperoni and low-quality cheese is your "thing," then you're in for a treat.)
Value: F (Most restaurants use large pies to serve single slices... Not here.)
Overall: F (May as well serve English muffins with Ragu. In fact, that might taste better.)