Monday, December 17, 2012

Lincoln's Waffle Shop Food Review

A Nightmare on 10th Street

I wonder how Honest Abe would feel about having his name associated with Lincoln's Waffle Shop, an old-fashioned coffee shop located across the street from Ford's Theatre and a few doors down from the Petersen House, where President Lincoln died almost 150 years ago. I can't speak for our 16th president; but this reviewer thinks it's a dump.

There's nothing charming about walking into a restaurant; and having a guy frantically yell, 'Sit there! Sit there! Anywhere!' Stunned, I walked towards one of the tiny tables against the wall, but was quickly reprimanded, 'Go to counter. Easy access!' Before I could argue or comply, another employee behind said counter started yelling at me too, 'Sit here. Anywhere!' I felt like a cow being led to the slaughterhouse: I half expected one of the employees to pull out a stun gun once I sat down.

Jumbo hamburger with french fries

The horror continued once I was finally in place. I ordered a hamburger, fries and soda ($6.95 + $1.95 for the pop... great price, especially for a "tourist spot.") Before I knew it, I had to get up again... You have to walk over to the refrigerators, to get your own bottle of soda. Thankfully, nobody yelled at me this time. I sat back down and "took in" the atmosphere, while I waited for my burger.

For starters, this place is old. I wouldn't be surprised if Abraham Lincoln did eat here once (as their website jokingly infers.) Employees are constantly screaming and yelling at each other... except for the grill man, who was glued to his cell phone while cooking. If you're trying to paint a picture inside your head, I must add that he was wearing a Joe Montana jersey in lieu of a uniform. Joe Montana. I told you this place was old.

My food arrived in good time, but I can't say I was happy to get it. The burger was slathered in mayo, even though I specifically asked for lettuce and tomatoes only. It's a good sized patty with a nice, soft bun; but the meat was cooked to death. Is there such a thing as well, well done? Evidently so. Naturally, the burger had zero seasoning... and the fries tasted as bad as they looked (see below.)

To their credit, the employees seemed to be having a good time: They were even chipper with some of the customers. This place would have looked antiquated back in 1979, yet alone 2013. Even their website looks old (their own photographs are out-of-focus!) Lincoln's Waffle House is one tourist trap worth missing.

Atmosphere: F (I'd rather eat on the street.)
Burger: D- (The bun was nice: Other than that, nada.)
Fries: F
Price: B (Under $10, before the tip.)
Service: D- (Quick service avoids another F.)
Overall: F (Hard Rock Cafe is literally steps away... why would anyone come here?)