Thursday, February 16, 2017

The Great Wall Movie Review

Matt Damon stars in The Great Wall
Under Seige

Rotten Tomatoes Plot: Starring global superstar Matt Damon and directed by one of the most breathtaking visual stylists of our time, Zhang Yimou (Hero, House of Flying Daggers), Legendary's The Great Wall tells the story of an elite force making a valiant stand for humanity on the world's most iconic structure. The first English-language production for Yimou is the largest film ever shot entirely in China. The Great Wall also stars Jing Tian, Pedro Pascal, Willem Dafoe and Andy Lau.

"Please tell the world what you have seen, and tell them what is coming." I've seen Yimou's The Great Wall, and it ain't pretty. It cost a small fortune ($150+ million) but I dare you to stay awake through all 104 minutes. If you do, expect Damon's worst performance (and accent) of his career, endless waves of CGI lizards and some of the cheesiest 3D effects ever produced (look out, it's an arrow axe spear!) That said, it's a complete lack of backdrop/story that dooms this wannabe epic from the opening frame. A colossal waste of money (and time.)

Grade: F